The Continuing Relevance of My Friend Billy Palmer's Commencement Address

Some of you know that many of my closest lifelong friends are former Gaston Day classmates from my years here as a student. Dolph and Liz Sumner, Gene Matthews, and Pam and Andy Warlick were all classmates. Bill Palmer and Walter Gayle were a year ahead of me. After Gaston Day, Bill Palmer graduated from the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill and Campbell University Law School, and then was one of two attorneys who established the respected Charlotte law firm of Kirk, Palmer, and Thigpen. Bill died too early several years ago from brain cancer. He was universally respected and admired in the Charlotte legal community and among his wide circle of friends and acquaintances. Those of us who knew and loved Bill still miss him dearly. But we also celebrate his good influence on our lives and how much his friendship meant to us. 

Recently, Bill's son Reid was cleaning out his father's papers and found a copy of Bill's 1974 Gaston Day School Commencement Speech which he made as class president. Reid sent me a copy. Reading it was very moving. But I was also struck by how so much of Bill's description of Gaston Day's exceptional quality in those first years remains true today. I am sharing the address with you in the hope that you find the remarks of such a fine man and his insights into the value of Gaston Day education just as relevant today as they were then. CLICK HERE

On a lighter note, Bill's commencement address mentions the serious financial contribution--$35.00--that each member of the junior class was expected to make toward the cost of the Junior-Senior prom. Even adjusting for inflation, costs have definitely skyrocketed!!

Teamwork Makes the Dream Work

For those of you who are grandparents, you know what a constant joy it is to watch your grandchildren grow up. And you cherish every endearing thing they say or do. So please indulge me in sharing something special that my two years, eight months old grandson James Isaac Rankin said last week. Believe it or not, I think it has great value for all of us, and that's why I am devoting this blog post to it. And, yes, I admit that I am a doting grandfather. 

Here is some necessary background. My son Isaac (Gaston Day Class of 2007) and daughter-in-law Becca are parents of our only grandson James Isaac. Happily, Becca is expecting another boy in August. So James Isaac has a baby brother on the way. Becca is a wonderful mother who balances love with a no nonsense attitude that keeps James Isaac--who is mischievous--in line. One of her favorite sayings when she wants James Isaac to pitch in and clean up a mess he has made--when his toys are scattered all over the floor or there is a messy table that needs to be cleaned up--is "Teamwork makes the dream work." This is Becca's shorthand slogan for letting James Isaac know that everybody in the family is expected to do their part. That many hands make light work. That we are all in this together and everyone needs to contribute. What a wonderful, brief proverb that captures so much in so few words about how success and happiness depend on each of us doing our part. "Teamwork makes the dream work!!" gets said often in Isaac and Becca's household. 

Recently, father Isaac and son James Isaac have been trying to help out even more around the house because mother Becca is almost six-months pregnant. In particular, they have been picking up a lot of takeout meals from local restaurants so Becca won't have to prepare them at home. Last week the dynamic duo of Rankin men went to a local barbecue restaurant to do just that. Because Isaac cannot leave James Isaac in his car seat while he goes into the restaurant to pick up the food and pay for it, both of them have to put on their masks and go into the restaurant together. Like all of us, James Isaac does not like wearing his mask. So after they parked at the barbecue joint and were ready to go into the restaurant, Isaac turned to James Isaac in the back seat and explained that he had to put on his mask, that it was important to do so, and that he really needed him to cooperate even though it was no fun wearing a mask. 

After making his speech, Isaac asked the all important question, "James Isaac, do you understand me and will you wear your mask?" James Isaac smiled, looked at his Dad, and replied simply, "Teamwork makes the dream work." This absolutely cracked his father up because Isaac had no idea that young James Isaac had actually internalized and understood what his mother had been telling him so often at home. But he had!! James Isaac already understands that everybody has to pitch in and do their part, even when it isn't always fun to do so, in order to make good things happen. 

The more I have thought about this, the more convinced I am that "Teamwork makes the dream work." is one of the keys to a good life and to building a good community. It says so much that is wise and true in so few words. Accomplishing good things requires all of us sacrificing and working together toward a common goal, whether that is picking up a barbecue dinner or our toys or playing on an athletic team together or working on a group science project. 

If James Isaac will always remember that "Teamwork makes the dream work" then he is going to make everything he does better. 

Best GDS April Fool's Prank Ever!

Day before yesterday, March 30, Gaston Day parent Beth Jarman dropped off her son Alton in the Lower School drop-off, and then pulled over and rolled down her window to tell me the following. Beth is married to my first cousin-once removed Jay Jarman. So we know each other outside school.

Here was her story. She had just gotten her haircut a few days ago and attended son Henry's middle-school baseball game at the Frances Henry Field the night before. Several children and adults at the game mistook her for Rebekah Bing. Beth didn't really know Rebekah, who is my executive administrative assistant, but now, after being called Mrs. Bing so many times, she found out who Rebekah was. End of story.

(l to r): Rebekah Bing & Beth Jarman

Guess what. With Beth's new haircut, she and Rebekah really do look a lot alike! In fact, they could almost be twins!

After carpool, I went in to my office and told Rebekah about Beth's story of mistaken identity. We both had a good laugh. I didn't think anything more about the whole matter until the next morning, once again in Lower School carpool drop-off. As Beth turned in ---yes, I know all your cars--it occurred to me that it would be a great prank to switch out Rebekah and Beth at school, and see if Beth could fool people at Gaston Day. Then--like a gift from the Universe--it dawned on me that it was the day before April Fool's day. The timing was perfect!!

I pitched my idea to Beth in the carpool line right then. She was all in. Next I presented the same thing to Rebekah. She was immediately very excited and took the plan and ran with it. Rebekah and Beth schemed and coordinated. Here was what they devised and carried out today. Rebekah had two identical athletic shirts and masks. She and Beth dressed just alike and wore their hair the same way. Rebekah sent all the top GDS administrators a message from me telling them to pick up an important document at the front desk this morning. Beth came in about 9 am today. Rebekah hid in my office. I ran an errand because I was so excited that I thought I might blow their cover if I stayed. 

We set up hidden cameras. We had Melissa Fayssoux in on the joke. She sat in the office and answered any tough questions that came up as a part of casual conversation. Beth, in her Rebekah Bing disguise, handed out the envelopes with a message inside that told each recipient that they had been April Fool pranked and to come back in 45 minutes to learn more. In came the administrators, one at a time to pick up their envelopes from me. Some of them figured out that Beth was an impostor immediately. Some of them figured it out after about 15 seconds! Some of them never figured it out!! All of this is captured on video!!!

We all had so much fun!! After revealing our prank to the administration, Beth and Rebekah walked around the school and messed with people's minds. One would say "hey" to someone, and then the other would follow behind twenty yards and do the same thing. The confusion and double takes were hilarious. 

I hope Gaston Day will always be a place that laughs a lot, and does not take itself to seriously. We sure did today. Best GDS April Fool's prank ever!! 

Are you really sure that was Mrs. Bing you were talking to today?

Red-Shouldered Hawks in Love: A Wildlife Misidentification and Further Drama at Gaston Day

My earlier blog posts on what I thought was a pair of red-tailed hawks elicited two interesting responses from followers. The first was from Caroline Ilse, a 2017 GDS graduate, Virginia Tech senior, and self-described "wildlife conservationist." After reading my post, Caroline correctly pointed out that our pair are Red-Shouldered Hawks, not Red-Tailed. She is absolutely right. I went online to bird identification sites, and the differences are real, if subtle. The Red-Shouldered Hawk has more mottling on its upper chest. The Red-Tailed Hawk has a whiter upper chest and a redder tail (hence its name). Thank you, Caroline, for setting me straight. At Gaston Day, we like accuracy and admitting our mistakes.  

Other news. Legendary former Lower School Head Marianna Davis read my post and called to ask if it
was possible that the same pair of hawks had a territory that extended to her house on Robinson Road. Her house is probably three miles from Gaston Day the way the hawk flies. She has seen two hawks generally fitting the description of the Gaston Day pair flying around her property. So I told her to try to determine whether her pair were Red-Shouldered. If they are, then chances are they are the same birds. 

Isn't it neat to think that Mrs. Davis may be connected to Gaston Day once again through our hawks? 

Mrs. Davis, has anyone ever called you "legendary" before? If not, it is well deserved.

Finally, I have been watching carefully each morning to see which way the hawks enter campus. They are flying in from the southwest. So their nest must be somewhere on that edge of our property or farther toward the airport. 

They still come to the flagpole almost every morning during carpool. Then they often fly down and alight either on the soccer goals or one of the posts behind the goals that support the backstop nets. Then after a few minutes, they take flight and abandon campus entirely for their hunting pursuits and parts unknown--maybe soaring over to Mrs. Davis's place.

Who knew that something so simple and beautiful could also be so absorbing?

(photo by Ian Greene)

Red-Tails in Love: A Wildlife Drama at Gaston Day School

 For those of you interested in a great natural history read, I recommend Red-Tails in Love: Pale Male's Story--A True Wildlife Drama in Central Park. It is the true story of a pair of red-tailed hawks that were discovered by a group of New York City's Central Park bird watchers after the raptors built their nest on a Fifth Avenue apartment building across from the park. As seen through the eyes of the bird watchers, the fate of the birds and their fledglings is spellbinding.

Gaston Day has its own red-tail hawk drama unfolding right before our eyes. Have you seen the large red-tail hawk that often sits atop the flag pole at carpool drop-off each morning? It is a magnificent bird, and many of the students who enter the school point it out. This morning, Mike Greene, upper-school math teacher, and his son Ian followed the bird after it glided down to sit on the top of the soccer goal on the field's west end. Ian snapped the pictures below. 

I have been watching this hawk and its mate--yes, there are two of them--for several weeks now. One is much smaller than the other, and I assumed that the smaller bird was the female. But I was wrong. So the smaller hawk is the male. The larger hawk is the female. When I researched red-tailed hawks for this post, I learned that the female is usually three inches larger than the male. They will have a nest somewhere nearby this spring, and Gaston Day will have a hatch of young red-tail chicks.

After reading about red-tails on the North Carolina Wildlife site, I understand what our pair is doing each morning. The first thing that a red-tail hawk does after leaving the nest at daybreak is find a high perch nearby. That is what is happening when our female flies up on the flagpole during morning carpool. Her nest has to be close. Has anyone seen it? Be on the look out and let's try to find it. I am going to watch carefully to see what direction she comes from as she flies to the flagpole. That way I may be able to determine the patch of woods where the nest is. So our lady red-tail on the flagpole is just waking up and starting her day. 

After she leaves the flagpole, she will fly aloft 200 or 300 yards up in the sky for as long as two or three hours without stopping or lighting. That is, unless she sees something on the ground to eat. With incredible vision, she is scanning for small rodents, rabbits, reptiles, and even insects. If she spots one, she descends in a steep, 45-degree dive, falling almost like a rock to hit her prey. Once a red-tail focuses on a potential prey, it seldom misses its target. 

Other things I learned in doing research for this post. Did you know that a group of two or more hawks flying together are known as a "boil" or a "knot"? I didn't either.

Seeing our red-tails has already gotten me thinking about the chicks they will hatch in the spring. Won't it be wonderful if we see two or three immature red-tails with their mother out near the flagpole? 

For me, the constancy of nature has been encouraging during the Covid-19 pandemic. For the red-tails at least, things are normal and routine. It will be for us too, you know. The vaccinations are coming soon to protect us. 

In the meantime, I am enjoying the simple beauty of Gaston Day's red-tail hawks and the wonder of creation that they reveal. If you have not seen them, check out the flagpole each morning. 

(photos courtesy of Ian Greene)